Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Jamaican Me Crazy

In my younger years I have danced with the devil and dealt with quite a few fires in my life. For each fire and each devil that I have danced with, I have learned quite a bit. This one starts out pretty awesome, but like every great beginning comes a horrible flaming ending... Is that how the saying goes?

First, let me clarify by stating that names will be changed so if YOU happen to read this, John, you may find that I have changed your name to John mostly for your protection.


John was such a great guy. He showered me with compliments, gifts and even a trip to beautiful Jamaica. I even got a really fancy expensive toothbrush. You know the one that spins a million miles a minute and is also equipped with a teeth whitening function. Thanks to John, my dentist is extremely happy.

It was safe to say I was pretty happy with this particular Prince, but as the days changed into weeks and the weeks turned into months he started to ask me to sext him. Now some girls may like sending a nip here and there but I do know that humans can sometimes be horrible. What if he was mad at me one day and as I'm driving down the highway jamming to some Josh Abbott, minding my own business and there on a billboard was my nipple. Here is where the smoke formed. John didn't realize he was dealing with a Princess. Last I checked Cinderella was not ripping her bra off and sending sexts to Prince Charming. Instead of being pissed off at John I gave him reasons why I was not comfortable taking pictures of my naked parts and sharing them with him via electronically. A few examples that I gave him were that my parents raised me better than that,  I didn't feel comfortable and that I didn't want my goodies to be shared over the internet.

Sadly, I believed that John understood where I was coming from. Little did I know, eventually he would ask another girl for nudes. I have to admit that I was heartbroken. Looking back on that relationship I learned no matter how much pressure someone puts on you, you should always stand up for what you believe in.

As you can see this didn't end up to be My Fairy Tale Ending.


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